Darts, Dominoes and Dirty Looks: Seven Ways to Break a Last-Man-Standing Deadlock
Why a coin toss is a crime against pub sport
A coin toss is fine for deciding who kicks off. It is not fine for deciding who advances in a last-man-standing competition that has already cost everyone a fiver, three hours and a small amount of dignity. A proper decider should be quick, easy to explain, hard to cheat and dramatic enough that the loser cannot complain too loudly. Ideally, it should also give the winner a story worth telling at the bar.
Here are seven pub games that fit the bill, ranked for the average UK boozer with a dartboard, a pool table, a domino set and a landlord who wants his glasses back before midnight.
1. One-dart shootout
Quick rules: Each tied player throws one dart at the bullseye. Closest to the centre wins. If it is too close to call, go again. No warm-ups, no practice darts, no ‘I was just finding my range’ nonsense.
Time needed: Two minutes, plus four minutes of somebody insisting the dart was definitely on the line.
Fairness: High. It is one throw, same target, same conditions. It rewards nerve more than technique, which is exactly what a tie-breaker should do.
Drama factor: Excellent. The whole pub goes quiet, then everybody claims they could have hit it.
Pub etiquette: Stand behind the oche. Do not breathe loudly. Do not say ‘he’s got the yips’ while a player is throwing, even if he clearly has.
2. Three-dart 101 checkout race
Quick rules: Players start on 101 and race to zero, finishing on a double. Three darts each, alternating turns. First to check out wins. If nobody checks out after three rounds, reduce to 41 and carry on.
Time needed: Five to eight minutes. Longer if somebody keeps hitting 26 and calling it ‘a solid scoring visit’.
Fairness: Good. It rewards actual darts ability rather than pure luck, which some people will appreciate and others will resent.
Drama factor: Strong. A checkout attempt brings the kind of tension usually reserved for the final frame of a pool match or a last crisp in the packet.
Pub etiquette: Call your score clearly. Do not celebrate a 45 like it is a nine-darter. And if you bust, do not argue with the chalker.
3. Dominoes: highest double, then best of three
Quick rules: Each player draws one domino. Highest double wins the first call. If nobody has a double, highest total wins. Then play a short best-of-three block game, or simply use the highest-double draw as the decider if time is tight.
Time needed: Two minutes for the draw, ten to fifteen for a short game.
Fairness: Good, as long as everyone knows whether doubles are high or low before the draw. This is the pub-game equivalent of checking the offside rule before kick-off.
Drama factor: Surprisingly high. Dominoes are quiet, then suddenly somebody slams down a double-six and the table erupts.
Pub etiquette: Do not hide dominoes up your sleeve. Do not ‘accidentally’ knock the table. And do not claim a rule from a pub in Cornwall that nobody else has heard of.
4. Pool: three-ball clearance
Quick rules: Place three balls in a line near the baulk end. Players take turns trying to pot all three in as few shots as possible. Lowest number of shots wins. If tied, sudden-death one-ball pot.
Time needed: Five to ten minutes, depending on how many times somebody calls the cue ‘bent’.
Fairness: Medium to high. It rewards cue control, but table roll and luck can play a part. The sudden-death pot keeps it moving.
Drama factor: Very good. A long pot to win a tie-breaker is pub cinema.
Pub etiquette: Chalk the cue. Do not use the cue as a walking stick. And if you lose, do not blame the table, the cue, the lights or the phase of the moon.
5. Cards: pontoon sudden death
Quick rules: Each player gets one card face up. They can twist once or stick. Closest to 21 without going bust wins. Ace counts as one or eleven, face cards as ten. If everyone busts, the highest card wins.
Time needed: Three minutes. Four if somebody asks for a ruling on whether a joker is ‘a bit of a wildcard’.
Fairness: Medium. It is a card game, so luck is part of the deal. But one twist keeps it snappy and stops it becoming a full casino night.
Drama factor: Good. The ‘twist or stick’ moment is beautifully simple, and everyone understands it after one pint.
Pub etiquette: Do not deal from the bottom. Do not invent a house rule mid-hand. And do not celebrate a winning hand by slapping the table so hard the dominoes jump.
6. Table skittles
Quick rules: If your pub has a table skittles set, each player gets three balls or three throws. Highest score wins. If tied, one ball each, sudden death. If your pub does not have table skittles, this is your excuse to find one that does.
Time needed: Five minutes, plus ten minutes of explaining the rules to the person who has had three pints and thinks it is ‘like ten-pin bowling but smaller’.
Fairness: High. It is a proper pub game with a proper score, and the equipment does most of the arguing for you.
Drama factor: Excellent. The sound of skittles going down is one of the great pub noises.
Pub etiquette: Retrieve the balls yourself. Do not swing the ball like you are bowling in a Test match. And do not claim the table is slanted unless you can prove it with a spirit level and a witness.
7. Bar-billiards-style pot challenge
Quick rules: If your pub has a bar-billiards table, each player gets three shots to pot a single ball. If no table is available, recreate a mini version on the pool table with three balls and a chalk mark. Pot in fewest shots wins. Tied players go to a one-shot sudden death.
Time needed: Five minutes. Longer if the table has a ‘mind the gap’ pocket that eats balls for fun.
Fairness: Medium. The table can be temperamental, which is part of the charm and part of the complaint.
Drama factor: Good. A gentle roll into a tight pocket is more tense than it has any right to be.
Pub etiquette: Do not lean on the table. Do not jockey the machine. And do not pretend you meant to use the cushion.
Choosing the right decider for your crowd
If your league is full of dart throwers, use darts. If it is a mixed crowd, use cards or dominoes. If you want spectacle, use pool or table skittles. If you want speed, use the one-dart shootout. The best tie-breaker is the one everyone can understand before the first throw, not the one that sounds cleverest in the group chat.
Write the chosen decider into your house rules before the competition starts. Say who throws first, what happens if it is a draw, and whether practice throws are allowed. Then stick to it. The point of a decider is not to find the best player in the pub. It is to end the tie without ending the friendship.
And if all else fails, remember the golden rule of pub sport: the coin toss is always there. It is just a bit boring. You have a dartboard, a domino set and a landlord who wants his table back. Use them.
